A realization:

The past few months have been a little difficult, considering stresses with school and things among our church. I've had a lot of meltdowns. I've also had a lot of good days. But mostly, I've been left with confusion and a cloudy view of what's next in life.

Basically, I believe that I've finally come to that place in life when I'm trying to figure out who I am and what I'm meant to be doing. I have a lot of identities in my marriage and family ties, but I've yet to figure out where exactly I fit as an individual. What am I supposed to be doing with myself? Because some days, I look around and truly feel as though the majority of the things I'm involved in are solely to fill time/pay bills.

Today is just a weird day. I'm trying to figure out who I am. I thought I knew, but I'm learning that there's a little more to me than I was aware of, emotionally.

I sure hope Brian survives this mess ;) I know I probably have driven him crazier than he ever deserved over the last few months.

Perhaps there's an answer or contentment ahead. Maybe it's just today. Maybe it's just me.